Unemployed

Yesterday was my last day of work. It wasn't even a full day, I was there just a couple of hours tying up "loose ends." Like, deleting the favorites file from my computer and printing out reference sheets.

Unemployment has been applied for, resume put together, portfolio in progress... and a lot of empty time ahead. I can do anything, everything, and nothing. I can redesign my entire life or simply look for another position, doing the same thing. With likely the same outcome.

But what do I want?

I want to create. I want to telecommute. I want to raise my children myself, but I want to work and show them what can be done, what must be done. What do you do with all that empty time?

I have no idea.

For now, for the present, I will be here, with my boys, spending time. Cleaning, running a garage sale. Tomorrow I think we will go to the open house at NASA. You don't get many chances to do that and it fits right into our new budget. Free.

And after that? After that is a lot of open time, free space, a whole new blank page waiting to be filled. But what to write?

Goodness Gracious

So much to write about, but wow, for someone who is about to be unemployed, I sure have a lot going on. Translation? Too busy to blog.

And since I'm in a gloom & doom frame of mind lately (hey - gimme a couple weeks, okay?) I leave you with the lyrics to the late, great Kevin Gilbert's Goodness Gracious.

Goodness Gracious is there nothing left to say?
When the ones that get to keep looking
are the ones that look away
It's pabulum for the sleepers
in the cult of brighter days

Goodness Gracious at the mercy of the crooks
We're broke and stroking vegetables
and there's way too many cooks
In every pot a pink slip, In every mouth a hook

Goodness Gracious I'm not listening anymore
Cause the spooks are in the White House
and they've justified a war
So wake me when they notify
we're gonna fight some more

Goodness Gracious not many people care
Concern is getting scarcer
true compassion really rare
I can see it on our faces. I can feel it in the air
Goodness Gracious me.

Goodness Gracious my generation's lost
They burned down all our bridges
before we had a chance to cross
Is it the winter of our discontent or just an early frost?

Goodness Gracious of apathy I sing
The baby boomers had it all and wasted everything
Now recess is almost over
and they won't get off the swing

Goodness Gracious we came in at the end
No sex that isn't dangerous, no money left to spend
We're the cleanup crew for parties
we were too young to attend
Goodness Gracious me.

Goodness Gracious my grandma used to say
The world's a scary place now,
things were different in her day
What horrors will be commonplace
when my hair starts to grey?

Wow what a sucky week

Okay, the reason I haven't posted in over a week is because it's been the worst week on record.

First, Kyan's sperm donor has asked to have a review to possibly reduce the amount of child support he doesn't pay. I can't for the life of me figure out why he's allowed to do that since he's in severe arrears, but the laws in this state suck, so he is. Whatever, I'll deal with it. It's not like I can get less than the nothing I'm getting now.

Then on Weds, my boss came to me and (tearfully) told me that she can't keep the company going and that we'll be closing at (most likely) the end of June. My insurance will be good until then, but she doesn't know what kind of hours I'll be working. Thankfully, I have time off that she owes me so we won't be completely screwed. The economy bites and I'm really not sure what I want to do now, and at this point I'm not in a state of mind to write about it here. The only thing I do know, is that this gives me July and August to spend with my kids, which rocks. I mean, I went back to work when Kyan was 4 weeks old and haven't spent more than 5 consecutive days with him since. So we're due, I think. I just wish it wasn't being brought about by unemployment.

Ugh.

So, if anyone still reads this poor, abandoned blog, I wanna know - if you had the chance, what would you do? Since I'm really not sure I want to do graphics anymore (it's really a dying field), I want to see what else is out there. So what would you do?

It's funny tho... the thing that started this bummer week was the whole child support issue, but turns out it's probably going to backfire on him. Most likely conclusion? He'll end up ordered to pay more.

[sarcasm] And gee don't we feel sorry for him. [\sarcasm]

Geez, wait long enough between posts?

Sorry, never said I was an everyday blogger. I do need to get better about that tho. So many things missing. Updates on Jaben's role in Oliver Twist (he's the Artful Dodger, btw). His show is June 8 @ 3pm - tickets are $5 for anyone who wants to attend. I know I'm biased n stuff, but he's so cute in this role!! Okay, so I'm calling an almost 12-yr old cute... but he IS! Just don't tell him I said it!

And speaking of cute, should we talk about Kyan? No major milestones lately, just some super fast growing (I swear all of his pants are capris now), and the usual everyday surprises. The things this kid says... And of course no immediate examples come to mind. He was great at our little Cinco de Mayo party last Sunday. Okay, so it was the 4th, so Quatro de Mayo, but whatever. We had a pinata and it KILLED him knowing it was there and full of candy until we actually allowed him to take a crack at it. Course it was a tough one and it took the grown ups some turns till we were finally able to get it open, but it was a great time!

Finally, a blog post by Wil Wheaton that I really liked. I definitely appreciate and agree with many of his political views, and this one was great!

I will try to do better and write more posts. Maybe something amusing, informative, or just more interesting than what's here. And yes, I'm aware that I've been tagged. I'll get to that - I promise!